THE ROAD OF LIFE:The Unknown,Subconscious,Supernatural,Mysteries-Its Relevance And Our Personalities.

THE UNTOLD STORY

 Jack Finney's "Third Level"'s Protagonist Charley, one day suddenly ventures out in the third level of Grand Central Railway Station -The level which Charley and mostly all knew that  never existed as from ages there were only two levels from where people could board trains.But Charley does happen to bump into the third level and not only this he goes back almost a century.....This can be termed by others as his figmentation or fabrication of mind...But the things,currency,people whatever he saw and experienced there were not of his era. His Psychiatrist friend explained it as his "WAKING UP WISH FULFILLMENT"i.e. when sometimes we want to possess anything badly, we experience it live and almost as if it has happened.

THIS IS A REAL ACCIDENT WHICH I SURVIVED ON THE ROAD OF LIFE:

There are numerous such stories floating in our daily lives about supernatural objects,mysteries and the unknown.If you visit a Psychiatrist they will term it as a figmentation of your minds but many a times we have noticed NEWS CHANNELS AND MEDIA shouting out about the authenticity of such happenings,however mostly they say that the viewers have to decide whether to believe or not on such happenings-they do not take any responsibility.But Why then they are showing such shows and clippings.....Simply to increase their T.R.P. as they know such things inflame the emotions,feelings and minds of people not only in India but all over the Universe.

But there are thousands instance which sometimes force most of the literate,scientific,developed minds to go numb and boggled.THIS INSTANCE IS OF ABOUT EIGHT YEARS BACK.

I was at that time staying at Hazaribag,a beautiful.picturesque,scenic place in the State of Jharkhand.The place boasts of clear rills,waterfalls,hot springs,thick forests with tribal and straight forward people. Definitely it had animals too in abundance-from foxes, varieties of deer,bears, bisons, leopards ,tigers and the most cunning and the creepy ones were the venomous reptiles.Though born and brought up near the Ganges Plains I have literally grown among snakes and scorpions but the incident which I  faced in Hazaribag makes me to think about the stories of the jungle people-the KING COBRA taking revenge-BUT HERE THERE WAS NO REVENGE STORY-WHAT THE SNAKE CHARMER TOLD ME WAS "A STORY OF JEALOUSY" Believe it or not my house-ONLY MY HOUSE in the entire official colony was continually attacked by a particular SPECIES OF SNAKES-BUT WHY? ONLY THE"SAPERA" had the answer.The snakes  climbed the stairs and would turn only towards my house as if they knew, their destination!!!!!   We all were traumatized-traumatized to the extent that our lives had become an unknown existence............

FINALLY HE CAME



 

FINALLY HE CAME-YES, I AN M.A.,M.B.A, ALUMNUS  OF PRESTIGIOUS SCHOOLS- LIKE NOTRE DAME AND LORETO CONVENT HAD TO CALL HIM! I WHO ALWAYS LAUGHED AT SUCH HAPPENINGS HAD TO CALL HIM-YES I CALLED a shabby Snake Charmer or "Sapera"-His rickety structure shabbily clad with overgrown nails and hair baffled me how he can save me and the children of my house from the vicious sting hallucinating and endangering our very existence!Till now I think it was the mercy of the Gods that we were alive as the reptiles were making timed attacks, hiding in toilets, kitchens, entwining the legs of Study Tables etc...BUT LO! THE SAPERA gave me "jadi"(HERB) and asked me to tie it in a cloth piece and hang it on that particular door from where snakes were entering AND BELIEVE IT OR NOT THE MOMENT I TIED THE "JADI" THE ATTACKS WERE DOOMED.Our lives once again came back on normal track.This can seem a joke to some people but this happened in my life.Now  I  too want to laugh it out but sometimes a chill runs down my spine when I think WHAT IF THE SAVIOUR SAPERA HADN'T COME?I do not want to make you superstitious-In fact I too,am questioning the credibility of such things and want my readers to share their feelings and experiences! 

 

MOST FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS

The most prevalent and common topic which draws interests of people of this planet is "If there is life after after death or not?"."Do supernatural objects exist or not?"."Is it true that souls are trapped in a mind swirling web of life and death and such souls haunt people from time to time". If I sit and narrate stories which I have heard-it will go on forever.....



WHAT DO RELIGION AND PHILOSOPHY SAY


Some Mythologies, Philosophy, Religion like HINDUISM STRONGLY BELIEVE IN LIFE AFTER DEATH, KARMA, ITS EFFECT ON OUR PRESENT AND FUTURE LIFE.What we are facing-whatever we are going through is all according to our deeds of our previous birth. The "deeds" of this birth decide our life in the next birth-Now this is also a kind of belief and faith-To believe or Not to believe is entirely upto the people concerned.



Here is an excerpt from the Blog "Life  After Death" by Bishop Alexander Mileant


This is one of the typical accounts collected by an American doctor-pediatrician Melvin Morse, published in his book Closer to the Light [7]. His first encounter with such an event of transitory death was in 1982 when he revived nine year-old Katherine who had drowned in a public pool. Katherine told him how, during the time she was dead, she met with a nice lady who called herself Elizabeth; this was probably her Guardian Angel. Elizabeth greeted Katherine's soul lovingly and talked with her. Knowing that Katherine was not ready to come into the spiritual world, Elizabeth allowed her to return to her body. At the time of this event, Dr. Morris' medical career had him working in a hospital in Pocatello, Idaho. The child's account had such a profound effect on a man who, until then, was skeptical of anything spiritual, that he decided to explore deeper what happens to a person immediately after death. In Katherine's case, Dr. Morse was especially astounded at the details with which she was able to describe what she had observed, both at the hospital and at her home, during the time she was clinically dead. Dr. Morse checked into and confirmed the accuracy of her "out of body" observations. It was as if she had been an eyewitness to the events that had transpired during the time that she was dead.

BUT DO SUPERNATURALS OR COMMONLY CALLED GHOSTS EXIST? WHAT DO PSYCHIATRISTS SAY?

SOME BELIEVE-SOME DO NOT.

PSYCHOLOGISTS say Ghosts,Phantoms,Supernaturals are all work of our brains and minds-no brain-no ghosts-It is the brain consciously or subconsciously which fabricates ghosts.

SUPERNATURALS-A TOPIC RELISHED UNCONSCIOUSLY.

We can not deny the fact that these topics and stories related are relished by people and draw interest of all. IN FACT FIFTY PERCENT OF THE BRITONS CLAIM TO HAVE SEEN A "GHOST" sometime or other in their lives.The Indians with their vast beliefs, thought, mythology are the worst sufferers.To us it is as real as life itself.

B.B.C. SAYS

Do you believe in ghosts?

Ghosts don't exist and are all in the mind according to a recent study by UK psychologists. A chill in the air, low-light conditions and even magnetic fields may trigger feelings that a presence is in a room - but that is all they are; feelings.

Hundreds of volunteers were led by researchers around two of the UK's supposedly most haunted locations - Hampton Court Palace, England, and the South Bridge Vaults in Edinburgh, Scotland.

SO BEFORE I CONCLUDE,I ASK MY READERS NOT TO BELIEVE IN SUCH EXISTENCES WHICH CAN DEFORM OUR PERSONALITIES FOREVER. HOWEVER I WOULD SURELY  ASK THEM THE FOLLOWING QUESTION AND WOULD BE VERY HAPPY IF I GET A REPLY OR ANY RELATED EXPERIENCE!

According to Psychologists and many others the haunting feelings exist but the ghosts do not - do you agree? Have you ever had any unusual, inexplicable experiences? Do you believe in ghosts? Please give your comments and vent out your feelings...

Take Care....................

rashmi.  

 

Effective Communication Skill-Path To Success

 Effective Communication according to me is an important ingredient of success. Some are blessed with this skill by birth but some need to improve on it. Here is an honest post from my side to help those who desire to hone and polish this skill leading to their ever growing success and enhancing their personality.

 Effective communication is all about conveying your messages to other people clearly and unambiguously. It's also about receiving information that others are sending to you, with as little distortion as possible.

Doing this involves effort from both the sender of the message and the receiver. And it's a process that can be tinted with error,  messages improperly delivered by the sender, or misinterpreted by the recipient. When this isn't detected, it can cause tremendous confusion, wasted effort and missed opportunity.Communication is a very powerful instrument and to get across it honestly is extremely important..It can create a negative or positive effect,so it is highly desirable that the message intended for the person is delivered across positively without any distortion.

In fact, communication is only successful when both the sender and the receiver understand the same information as a result of the communication.

By successfully getting your message across, you convey your thoughts and ideas effectively. When not successful, the thoughts and ideas that you actually send do not necessarily reflect what you think, causing a communications breakdown and creating roadblocks that stand in the way of your goals – both personally and professionally.

Communication sometimes is your way of perception of certain things.An extremely wealthy man took his son to the country side to actually perceive what poverty is like.After spending a day and night there with a very poor family,the father thought the message that he is showering wealth on his son and that he is very lucky to have a father like him must have gone down well with the son but the message which he wanted to communicate was not taken as desired.The son after the visit told his father that the realization that how poor he was has now dawned upon him after this visit.He realized that "he had only one swimming pool whereas the poor man had a full river to him",..."they had only one dog but the man had four",...and so on.....So we see here a fine example of "miscommunication"

A person can anytime improve his communication skill if he has a positive attitude towards life and things happening around him The first prerequisite is "developing positive perception towards life".Many other things too comprise the ingredient of fine communication like 

1.feeling at ease while communicating .

2.choice of correct words and phrases.
3.proper body language i.e.avoiding unnecessary fidgeting of limbs or sending wrong signals.
4.reading novels,current affairs on internet or in newspapers,watching news.A well-informed person can only interact positively.

5.eye contact but not actually foolishly staring at the person addressed to. 

6.work on certain paper exercise before any speech execution.

7.no one is perfect,so don't be overburdened with the baggage of "feeling confident".

8.be your natural self and have confidence+faith in your aptitude and skill.

9.be open to criticism and take it in good humor-don't let criticism ruin your confidence.Remember there are always certain people around you who are jealous and want to pull you down.
10.AND THE MOST IMPORTANT ONE IS BE A GOOD LISTENER. 

Good and effective communication can be you key to success as well as an ambiguous communication can ruin you.So think twice before you open your mouth.Useless gibbering and and angling for appreciation can be dangerous to your career.Give respect to those who command it and be pleasant to those who don't.Being vicious and unnecessary sycophancy will lead you nowhere.Keep away from "disparaging words and attitude but at the same time don't be disparaged" Learn to manage your talent and send across your message pleasantly.Nothing is going to help you except your positive self esteem, positive perception of things in a given situation and harnessing the various opportunities strewn all around you.So have faith and develop effective communication with your will power.


rashmi.

Extra Marital Relationship-Is It Really Extra?

EXTRA MARITAL RELATIONSHIP-the word EXTRA attached to MARITAL RELATIONSHIP has played havoc in the past and is still doing so.We accept extra- "a little more" in everything in fact we want a little more for everything except in a marital relationship!A LITTLE EXTRA FLAVOR IS WELCOMED IN EVERYTHING GOING EXCEPT MARRIAGE!I BUT LET US STOP AND THINK-IS IT REALLY AND ACTUALLY EXTRA OR WE JUST KEEP ON IGNORING FOR OUR CONVENIENCES MAKING IT "EXTRA"!

The entire Universe is entangled or rather entwined into many unsolved questions.A flower when blooms is assured of its destiny i.e. it will bloom,intoxicate and finally meet its inevitable doom, it does not know that its fate is not so simple-before meeting its final doom,it journeys up and down the scale of "destiny"only to be plucked and embellish different occasions-from marriage to death-from temple to graveyard....

A woman when born is declared to grow up and take care of her entire family in the purest way.She is assumed as an epitome of piety,especially in India! But those who have designated this role for her have never ever thought of "the same line of living for themselves"! It the woman who has to shoulder the burden of piety to keep the society free of dirt and germs spreading like an epidemic-men go scot- free!

I have pointed towards a burning topic "Extra Marital Relationships" -Is it justified or not? And if it is there,shouldn't both parties come clean with it to give a "cleaner image"! Why does it happen after all? And if it happens, why do people hide it from their spouses? Why people are so hypocritic in accepting this fact that parallel relationships or  love encounters exist or happen...

So many questions are related to this serious topic that I too sometimes get confused but after working on this topic and coming close to many couples,I realized that it is not only men who are cheating their wives ,IF AT ALL YOU CALL IT CHEATING!,The wives too are straying BUT has anyone wondered why or whether "the straying" factor is a new trend or has it been always there but under wraps and the "recent boldness" to come clean in relationships has made people to turn their heads and give it a serious thought!

If we look back or go down the pages of history, we can learn something interesting from Jayadeva's "GeetGovinda".Radha was married and elder to Lord Krishna but still both of them shared a magical relationship and are worshipped by the entire Human Race.No one knows what became of Radha After Krishna left her-how she fend for herself.Did She have to undergo severe trials of the society as woman is always punished for such deeds or was she then too ,worshipped the way we worship her now? Nothing much is written or found in historical books or inscriptions about this.The only thing which we the Historians ,have relished is their period of love-no one tried to dive into Radha's heart!Like all broken relationship here too "waves of tears and sorrows must have been involved". The Historians actually never tried to look into this aspect of LOVE or extra marital relationship which blossomed wildly and widely,the perfume of which would keep on intoxicating the generations to come!

Lord Krishna's love for Radha is well known but did he ever think how she would have  survived after he left her...The only thing which is appreciable THAT HE DID NOT HIDE HIS LOVE TO A MARRIED WOMAN FROM THE WORLD AND GAVE HER A STATUS WITH HIM BUT here Krishna was unmarried..I wonder what would have been the situation if  he was married too... but in those days such relationships were was allowed and acceptable.He had thousand queens and so did most of his contemporary rulers and men--Polygamy was an accepted phenomenon! In fact I praise Krishna for pronouncing his profound love for his beloved who was not his wife and giving the relationship a sacred platform But Krishna was God-what would the common human being do in such a situation?
READ A LINK OF LOVE(KAMASUTRA)
http://living.oneindia.in/kamasutra/spheres-of-life/rasa-lila-of-lord-krishna.html 


Heart does not think and enter into a relation,it just barges into it without thinking the consequences which can be really be dangerous in today's time.


The children, they say are the worst sufferers in such love triangles or "philandering situations"-BUT I DIFFER-Children always have to leave their parents after a certain age anyhow and if emotional trust is provided to them by either of the parents and counseled to cope the situation in a mature manner,they really come out of everything very quickly an accept as well as adapt themselves to their situations.It is the elders who do not let them accept the situation by inflaming their emotions to take revenge from their spouse!! The party which feels cheated make children their weapons to gain upper hand in such situations-the children are mercilessly dragged into all this.Actually after speaking to many children over this issue, it was shocking that only to give mental support to their parents they became a party in such a tirade-Actually they want an amicable situation either way-In fact to live in a house where parents have abusive relationship or "non-caring attitude" for each other is even  more hated by them.

In most of the talked about divorces we have seen the woman has marched away gloriously with a "fat alimony" leaving the spectators gaping.And have you ever thought that why those straying too, never want a divorce after all-IT IS NOT that they do not want the family or friends to be hurt- but actually it is the comfort zone to which they are so accustomed prevents them from taking any harsh step.So sometimes both the parties we see very conveniently forgive and forget their spouse's mistake(if you think it is) as we have seen in the case of U.S. President Bill Clinton's .

But this doesn't mean that such encounters are going to stop-those who think so are foolish or living in a fool's paradise.The beauty lies in accepting this as another aspect of life and dealing with it in a mature manner.A spouse may force his/her counterpart to detach from a particular relationship but how can she/he determine about probably many other such relationships.


What is required is a proper code of conduct.Relationships are one's own lookout and how one can handle them.It does not mean that I am agreeing to illicit affairs and hooks-I only want to accept people that love can happen anytime and anywhere in life.When such situation arises one has to act tactfully.Separation is not always the solution.No one can give a proper solution or a definite suggestion.The person involved have to themselves adopt a way which can keep everyone happy including him/her. We live few days and those few days too without happiness can make our life a burden for us.Life moves on but happiness does not knock at one's door always-So make everyone happy but do not forget your happiness.
rashmi.

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Love, Lust And Life

To my readers
Thank you for the overwhelming response.
The traffic of this blog surely points towards the "strong global fraternity"shared.
Thank you once again for the keenness shown for an Indian Writer.
This post is going to be  short and crisp.
I hope it will be liked .

What Is Life?

The Perception of life varies from person to person in different eras.Life holds many twisted,hidden as well as straightforward meanings. It is a crossword puzzle which sometimes is so easy to solve and at times remains unsolved for ages-the more we delve into it,the more lost we get. BUT WE ARE HERE TO STAY  AND NOT TO GET LOST.ONE SUCH SITUATION IS TO GET ENTANGLED IN THE MESH OF LOVE AND LUST AND LOSE A BEAUTIFUL RELATIONSHIP WHILE SEGREGATING THEM.

I am here discussing two major ingredients of life-love and lust.

The meaning of lust and love is very complicated and intertwined. LOVE surely is of many types i.e.love between siblings ,parents and their children, a ruler and his people BUT THE MOST COMMONLY DISCUSSED is the love between a lover and his beloved.It is generally believed that love is found on a platform which is poles apart from lust. YES TO SOME EXTENT IT IS TRUE BUT ONLY TO SOME EXTENT. Pure LUST is surely a thing commonly found in animals or  animals like humans BUT I have seen that animals who show their lust so vehemently too sometimes have strong affection for their partners.Actually projection of PURE LUST is a trait of an animal and humans who do so are after all not humans but REAL ANIMALS OF STONE AGE. SO WE MUST SHUN ANIMAL LUST-- NOT LUST SEQUINED WITH PEARLS OF LOVE.

BUT LOVE AND LUST CANNOT BE SEGREGATED,THIS IS WHAT I BELIEVE-AGREE WITH ME OR DISAGREE. If two people are in love, respect and care for each other,exhibiting passion synonymous to lust is not at all vile.I simply cannot understand  how thinkers keep these two aspects on  different platforms.For them the idea should be to ban lust in objectionable situations-situations where humans cross their boundary to display forceful lust in forced situations-if the lust is not forced and exists between two people, it is an art of love.I agree love is divine-this means- its feeling is divine but at some point it takes the form of beautiful lust i.e.passion- which yearns for love and to yearn or crave for love is not wrong at all-the gods too would stand and vouch for it.WE ARE HUMANS-LETS LIVE LIKE ONE.LETS NOT FORCE OURSELVES ON OTHERS BUT AT THE SAME TIME DO NOT CURB THE PASSIONATE FEELINGS SYNONYMOUS TO LOVE IN YOUR BEAUTIFUL RELATIONSHIP OTHERWISE AN ASPECT OF LIFE WILL REMAIN VACANT.

READ LOVEMAKING OF RADHA KRISHNA
http://living.oneindia.in/kamasutra/spheres-of-life/rasa-lila-of-lord-krishna.html


rashmi

PEER PRESSURE PAINS-TIME TO GIVE IT A SERIOUS THOUGHT!

Peer pressure refers to the influence exerted by a peer group in encouraging a person to change his or her attitudes, values, or behavior in order to conform to group norms. Social groups affected include membership groups, when the individual is "formally" a member (for example, political party, trade union), or a social clique. A person affected by peer pressure may or may not want to belong to these groups. They may also recognize dissociative groups with which they would not wish to associate, and thus they behave adversely concerning that group's behaviors.^{[citation needed]} Peer pressure can cause people to do things they would not normally do, e.g. promote hatred, take drugs, smoke, get a girlfriend, marry, get a job, have children, buy items they don't really need (cars, houses, boats), etc.This is the dictionary meaning of it.

Peer pressure at times can be killing and it is not that only children of High Schools AND Colleges are under going it .Even a three old Sarah wants a doll same as her friend because her "Status " needs A BOOST.

The level of peer influence generally increases as children grow, and resistance to peer influence often declines as children gain independence from the family or caregivers, and before they fully form an adult identity. Pre-school children tend to be the least aware of peer pressure, and are the least influenced by the need to conform. However with more social interactions outside the home and more awareness of others, the influence of peers increases.

Students in Colleges these days don't have only to cope up with studies but to look "handsome","macho" and so on...the list is never ending.Sometimes trivial matters like "teasing"."taunting" which is another form of bullying takes lives of children-either the "silent one ends up his life" or "unbelievable but true takes the life of those bullying him"!

The consequences sometimes are dangerous And Parents ,Teachers,Well Wishers Have To Take Actions Within Time.

Before it is too late the society as a whole has to come forward as a help or else everyday we are reading serious articles on this ever growing issue!We all know this but still think that situations will come under control on its own-we can close our eyes to what is happening in the name of ragging and easing pressure of exams,losing girlfriends,etc.Students resort to uncalled means,like drugs,alcohol,smoking,petty thievery to maintain their lifestyles etc.Who will help such dejected elements?Surely we have to do so-if required medication ,counseling and means to bring them back to mainstream should be adopted.SO GET UP AND BE A HELP BEFORE IT IS TOO LATE!

rashmi.

Rape And Rage-Humans Or Animals?

PREMATURE DEATH OF HUMANITY

 

This post is dedicated to those millions who have directly or indirectly suffered this murky and heinous crime and are forced to languish in the gloomy chambers of their hearts.Examples are quoted,only to make them realize that they should not suffer for these acts but make the "Doers" suffer.Sufferance is no solution.I know it is extremely difficult but I ask them to raise voice against such crimes instead becoming "a tortured psychological element of case studies"!

As observed by Justice Arjit Pasayat:
" While a murderer destroys the physical frame of the victim, a rapist degrades and defiles the soul of a helpless female."

 Sexual harassment is nothing less than the showcasing of male dominance. Given an opportunity, such men (those committing sexual harassement) would try fulfilling their desire.


HOW SAFE IS THE ARMY OR POLICE?(Here is an excerpt of leading News Media)
Los Angeles, Alta California - May 2, 2004 - (ACN) The release, by CBS News, of the photographs showing the heinous sexual abuse and torture of Iraqi POW's at the notorious Abu Ghraib prison has opened a Pandora's box for the Bush regime. Apparently, the suspended US commander of the prison where the worst abuses took place, Brigadier General Janis Karpinski, has refused to take the fall by herself and has implicated the CIA, Military Intelligence and private US government contractors in the torturing of POW's and in the raping of Iraqi women detainees as well.

Washington Post that Military Intelligence, rather than the Military Police, dictated the treatment of prisoners at Abu Ghraib prison. "The prison, and that particular cellblock where the events took place, were under the control of the Military Intelligence command," Brigadier General Karpinski said to the Washington Post Saturday night in a telephone interview from her home in Hilton Head, South Carolina. Brigadier General Karpinski, who commanded the 800th Military Police Brigade, deribed a high-pressure Military Intelligence and CIA command that prized successful interrogations. A month before the alleged abuses and rapes occurred, she said, a team of CIA, Military Intelligence officers and private consultants under the employ of the US government came to Abu Ghraib. "Their main and specific mission was to give the interrogators new techniques to get more information from detainees," she said. 

Now here we see the most heinous deed committed and a woman supporting it!BUT NOW CERTAINLY PEOPLE ARE DISPLAYING FAITH IN PRESIDENT OBAMA'S ESTEEMED GOVERNMENT

THE LINK BELOW CAN PROBABLY THROW SOME LIGHT ON MY FEELINGS:

http://www.aztlan.net/iraqi_women_raped.htm

PLEASE SEE THIS VIDEO AND JUDGE THE ATROCITIES COMMITTED-IF YOU HAVE TEARS..BE PREPARED TO SHED THEM!(Taken from web)

.

Below is a photograph how women are subjugated to "lusty tortures"

Well this can.t be termed as Rape but surely it is an insult to humanity -a dire case of INSULT AND MOLESTATION!

There are many incidents which lead us to think ,"Is there any difference between  humans and animals?"

In some countries "Rape if committed is a punishable offence-if it is half-way i.e.if the victim is tortured physically which would in all sense should be considered a rape BUT "since the actual act is not committed,the offenders go away clean with it"! But I am glad that at last our Indian Govt. has finally considered all such acts under the category of rape.But how many of us really move the courts or seek justice?" 

The society still has not come to terms with this horrifying,soul--butchering act to give peace of mind to the sufferers and their families-though to some extent people ARE COMING UP AND SPEAKING AGAINST but still it will take another about two decades to accept that the "DOERS SHOULD BE SHUNNED NOT THE VICTIMS!" AN EIGHT YEAR GIRL IN LIBERIA WAS SHUNNED BY HER OWN PARENTS AFTER THE HEINOUS CRIME ADDING A FURTHER BLOT ON THE FACE OF HUMANITY-NOW THINK AGAIN-ARE WE REALLY HUMANS? VISIT A HEART RENDING STORY OF MARITAL RAPE AND ABUSE:
http://rrashmi211.blogspot.com/2009/08/oceans-of-loneliness-standing-near.html 

To add to all these we have other so many kinds of categorized rapes like Date rapes,marital rapes,gray rapes,rapes with elderly women and  small children,sodomy and so on.....

But wait and think-We can categorize the crime but can we categorize the pain-THE PAIN WHICH IS DEEPER THAN DARKEST OF THE DEEPS-THE PAIN WHICH LEAVES THE SUFFERERS LAMED FOR YEARS WHICH HAS "NO CLOSING NIGHTS"!


THE MAIN AIM OF THIS POST OF MINE IS TO  INCULCATE A POSITIVE FEELING IN THE SUFFERERS AND ASSURE THEM THEY HAVE FULL RIGHT TO LIVE HAPPILY AS OTHERS AND IT IS NOT THEY WHO SHOULD BE SHUNNED BUT THE ANIMALS WHO LIVE IN OUR SOCIETIES .IF I WANT I CAN GIVE MILLIONS OF HEART-RENDING EXAMPLES-BUT IS IT OF ANY USE TO THE SUFFERERS AND MY READERS MORE OR LESS ALREADY KNOW-SO I ASK THE SOCIETY TO CO-OPERATE WITH  PEOPLE UNDERGOING SUCH TORTUROUS SITUATIONS TO SAVE THE ENTIRE HUMAN RACE FROM MALIGNING ITS NAME AND STRICTLY FORBIDDING ITS ANIMAL INSTINCTS TO RESURFACE.

READ HOW MINDS TOO CAN BE RAPED:
http://shimmeringbutterfly.blogspot.com/2010/11/raping-mind-ancient-way.html 
AND A REAL HEART WRENCHING STORY OF DOMESTIC VIOLENCE AND EXTREME EMOTIONAL RAPE:
http://rrashmi211.blogspot.com/2009/08/oceans-of-loneliness-standing-near.html


rashmi

Anger-The Deluge.Save yourself-Save Humanity!

"IF YOU ARE PATIENT IN ONE MOMENT OF ANGER.

YOU WILL ESCAPE A HUNDRED DAYS OF SORROW"

When this earth was created,along with it, many creatures too were given existence by "The Unknown Superior" who IS believed ,to have the power to give forms to his CREATIONS.A wonderful spectrum of SPECTACULAR SPECIES were given shape,gifted with amazing qualities leaving the Universe bedazzled! Mountains,valleys, brooks, rivieras,scented landscapes,each and everything inviting the curiosity of the species germinating,taking shapes on it. BUT THIS IS THE POETIC VERSION OF IT-ESPECIALLY OF A POET WHO PERCEIVES BEAUTY IN EVERYTHING.

HOWEVER EVERYTHING HAS A NEGATIVE ASPECT OF IT TOO-like we can say every coin has two sides! When this Universe was created,along with it Deadly Demons like snakes,crocodiles,scorpions, and Deadly Attitudes like lust,greed,jealousy,fear,and to top the list,ANGER WAS CREATED!!!

There are many aspects of daily life which need attention but the most prevalent one is Anger seen amongst people- in fact the worst sufferers of this deadly demon is THE CURRENT GENERATION.A small incident of annoyance make them to take irreparable grievous actions.We can say that this society is paying its price of success-with every step of advancement we are seeing two steps which are leading us to primitive ways of life!Anger is a strong emotion;a feeling that is oriented towards some real or supposed grievance.Underlying anger is caused by a perceived loss of control over factors affecting important values.The values maybe pride,love,loss of some prized possession or even to such trivial matter as to getting to any place at fixed and desired time-the failure of which leads to untoward consequences.

Actually it is not necessary that ANGER IS ALWAYS VOCAL-ITS CONSEQUENCES HOWEVER IS ALWAYS BLATANT!Sometimes Anger brews surreptitiously and constantly, suddenly resulting in volcanic eruptions  where we see people killing,torturing their own loved ones,maligning the strands of trust and love as they are not able to stand some acts of theirs which they perceive as undesired-repentance however follows but is it of any use?It is not only the victim who suffers but this one moment of anger costs the offender's entire life!Even if he is able to manipulate and escape legal punishment, HE CAN NEVER ESCAPE THE PUNISHMENT INFLICTED ON HIM BY HIS MIND AND SOUL

I am not suggesting a complete do-away with anger.it is an inherent quality found in all the creatures surviving here-I am only suggesting that Anger should be channelized effectively to give positive result! Now this statement can be baffling and my readers can ask ,"How Anger can be positive? TO THEM MY ANSWER IS- IT ENERGIZES US TO FIGHT AGAINST INJUSTICE OR WHEN PHYSICALLY ATTACKED-BUT THIS SITUATION TOO IS GENERALLY MISUSED-like we see rage shown on roads,against teachers,parents,peers etc There are common measures too almost known by all of us, to curb this deadly outburst of volcanic nature( most of us just shrug it off and don't take it seriously)-like practising meditation and yoga to fight back this lethal demon .So all in all I must say that we have to put a check on this negative quality of humans to make it a better place so that all the existing species can at least live in a harmonious halo of love ,affection,benevolence,peace,and the most important one-UNDERSTANDING SO THAT WE CAN SAVE OURSELVES FROM UNKNOWN MURKY DELUGE TRYING TO OVERPOWER OUR MINDS.... AND THIS WE CAN SURELY DO!

Manifestations And  Suggestions On How To Overcome Anger Will Be Given In The Next Post.
rashmi.
Please click on the link below AND WATCH HILARIOUS WAYS TO CONTROL ANGER!
Anger Management Pictures - Rotten Tomatoes

Sex , City , Scavengers And Interpersonal Skills!

MAKING MOUNTAIN OUT OF A MOLE-INTERPERSONAL SKILLS-"WHAT IS IT"?

My Readers would definitely wonder, what actually has happened to me and what exactly the topic holds for them!'WHAT A VOLATILE TOPIC IT IS?'Would it be worth reading? To them I would like to say,"give a look then form your opinion?"

Lexicons, people and hundreds of different websites daily come up with different expressions meanings and audio-visuals of Interpersonal Skills! So many meanings-enough to leave anyone baffled, confused, perplexed amazed and leading them after all nowhere!

Whenever I am asked to speak on this topic I simply laugh it off or resort to some musings which might not at all be serious at times!

Communicating effectively,convincingly,charismatically oozing self confidence has become the latest trend which gives the requisite lift to our "LIFESTYLES" though it can however, sometimes strangulate the listeners! BUT SIMPLY TO BE IN THE CIRCLES OF LITERATES "they" wear an intelligent look on "their" faces!!! What not has been said and done but the stark naked truth is that even I sometimes though unwillingly, have resorted to "hardcore professional terms" with "worksheets", "feedback forms"etc..etc.. etc...

Now let us come to a "profession" which has been eyed with suspicion and negativity but which is using this skill so deftly from ages and ages to get millions of visitors daily!. Though previously "they" were mostly illiterates in the said profession due to their " birth factor" or were forcibly pushed into it!

With the passage of time however the scenario has changed. Then they were called "prostitutes"-after a little while "sex workers" and now of course "Escorts"-Giving "style" and "oomph" to the same work, say modernizing the same element!!! Or one can say packaging the age old ingredients in a new more vibrant,tantalizing,illuminating "wrap"!!!!

It can be said "they" have even superseded "Management Gurus" in the their "trade"! If this is the trade they have been taught, forced into or chose on their free will- At least they have been honest enough to show the whole world their brilliancy in it! They have generated or catered to the needs of UNLIMITED SCAVENGERS IN UNLIMITED CITIES from Las Vegas to Portugal, Mumbai, Kolkatta and to many more glittering cities-cities that never sleep-cities which go on with its style,fashion,affluence,oomph and few "dumb people" (which probably includes me too) are trying to inculcate "interpersonal skills" in even "dumber people"-this really makes me to laugh!

This is a skill gifted to "them" most naturally even when there were no means of concrete communication-like postcards ,telegrams,cellphones, internet, emails ,fax etc.But nobody tried to learn this art from them as most of the time they were and are treated as malignant cell of the society and our bureaucrats, politicians, news channels and other eminent people DURING THE DAY TIME were and are wasting their time and energy to eradicate them from the society lest they would become cancerous! HOWEVER IN THE NIGHTS, THE STORY HAS BEEN ALWAYS DIFFERENT!!! Many times "such people" have been caught red-handed enjoying "their" companies unashamedly to their fullest!

Whether all this is a crime or not I'm no one to decide! CRIME is that when such people run away from this NAKED TRUTH during day time and don't look into the pains or sources of the pain, of the people in this "trade" which have brought them into this business. And instead during "DAY TIME THESE WHITE COLLARED PEOPLE" cover themselves under a quilt of "FALSE RESPECT"!

Sex sells and will sell, no one can stop or do anything about it.The age old "taboo" has millions of buyers every day and every night! But this doesn't mean that I am agreeing to this network which at times is murky, gloomy, pervert, abusive and filled with lechers or rather SCAVENGERS who are ready to tear apart soul and body of anyone-yes I mean anyone .For such SCAVENGERS "perversion" is their religion! Hence society as a whole has to be extra attentive of these SCAVENGERS as anytime "this pervert network" can show its venomous fangs and sting innocent people on the name of cleaning dirt from the society, by implicating false charges on them-AFTER ALL, THEY ARE SCAVENGERS, AREN'T THEY"? So you see how the network works!!!!!Before anyone close to you knowingly or unknowingly falls into this heinous , murky trap- get alert!!

Here I would like to applaud INDIA GOVERNMENT WHICH TOO HAS COME TO TERMS WITH AGE OLD TABOO "SEX"-THAT IS WHY SAFE SEX HAS BECOME AN IMPORTANT FEATURE IN THE RECENT CURRICULUM OF CBSE BOARD EXAMINATIONS "IN LIFE SKILLS" section and it is better for the parents too, to come to terms with it and develop a better communication with their children and inculcate positive values which really is a difficult task when in their CITY a certain INTERPERSONAL SKILL is flourishing"- with the help of ever multiplying SCAVENGERS!

Reverting once again to the ongoing topic,I do no want to malign anyone or take anyone's name here but my readers would definitely be knowing many such persons.I here, however cannot stop myself from mentioning a name selling like hot cake few days back- TIGER WOODS-BUT I REALLY ADMIRE HIM!! THE WAY HE HAS TAKEN UP EVERY THING IN HIS STRIDE IS COMMENDABLE! Every human being in his or her life is at times get drifted or allured! Don't we know, "to err is to human". One whose "acts" are out is a philanderer, coquette or a culprit and one whose follies are tightly secured in a sealed "ALLADIN' GINNIE'S BOTTLE" is a "saint"! Actually I must say Woods's Interpersonal Skill IS WEAK!!!! Or he realised, SILENCE IS THE BEST CURE! As sometimes silence holds more importance than "eloquence"! THE LADIES,HOWEVER, TURNED OUT TO BE SMARTER IN THIS ENTIRE EPISODE!!!They made money like hell.In fact his divorce too is up till now the "costliest"!(but the recent news,however is that Woods's wife is calling off the divorce-lets see what happens!)

But is anybody speaking about the million dollars he has given to the earthquake victims of Haiti!!!If at all someone speaks, will say surely that he did only to cover up his image and make it straight!!!Imagine a wife not wanting to touch her husband but willing to touch rather grab his million dollars after divorce! Now this is my view-I do not want anyone to abide by or agree to it.One thing which I like most about my country is "Freedom of Speech and Expression"!which has made me to sit at my desk and put my up views so freely!

Talking of Interpersonal skills, let us take a more simple example of renowned characters "BRUTUS" and" ANTONY" from Shakespeare's play "JULIUS CAESAR". Can anybody deny Antony's charisma of oratory and convincing power? He was so impressive that his speeches not only made the Romans to go against their "idol", Brutus but the mob themselves set their CITY Rome ablaze, threw their own children in fire but avenged Caesar's death and "fall"! Did Antony ever visit any "coaching center" to learn "oratory skills-correct choice of words and refrains?", which even defeated the legend "Brutus's views" who was held in high esteem by the Romans!! Caesar's death was avenged by a mesh of powerful words used correctly and timely by Antony whose tongue worked as fuel in inflaming and instigating the mob!


Now let us leave and keep away all examples. Shouldn't Interpersonal skill be cultivated with little efforts with one's own strong will? I am not suggesting that one should not take help of Trainers, Coaches, Teachers but unless one has the grit, will power and enthusiasm to try, no one can hone or polish their skills-not even the person best at it! And once Interpersonal skill is shown-courage comes naturally-courage to brave and fight against all odds and evens in life.....enough courage to show these scavengers their real and true places.Shouldn't we all join hands and vehemently oppose the SCAVENGERS who slyly and cunningly flourish in our cities under false cover of respectable persons!


So we see how SEX in our CITIES is flourishing and SCAVENGERS are roaming about freely-without fear! So it is high time now we come to "certain terms" and be comfortable and make others comfortable respectively.AND YES SCAVENGERS CANNOT BE ONLY A MAN,IT CAN BE A WOMAN OR A WHOLE NETWORK-SO COME TO YOUR SENSES, AWAKEN YOUR MIND, BODY SOUL AND FIGHT AGAINST IT!
Rashmi.
(started writing on 18th Jan-finished by 25th)

Emotional Compassion Versus Unknown Abuses

WHAT ARE WE REALLY DOING?

Being just a "HUMAN" is not enough- One has to become "HUMANE" to have eyes which can see in this biting cold,the chilling wind which every night,lurking slyly comes as messenger of death,to those sleeping on the footpaths,parks,under any half constructed building or a tree clutching tightly a stray dog for warmth who is more compassionate than any other rich man swirling past in their big cars,gifting a dusty cover ...for them life means more than hygiene..more than those bill boards mocking at the whole system to keep the environment free of certain diseases!This is INDIA..didn't they know when they were putting up such ironical hoardings!

C'mon,"They" knew very well but a kind of system has to be devised-a system has to exist but how much we all get out of it is a mystery and definitely history will stand to vouch for the same! Overburdened with poverty sharing meals with dogs and cat is a stark naked truth of the 'wretched Poor' of this country.Many want to shy away from this reality whilst some USE, very effectively and cleverly "this state of deprivation" to make their "fat" purse "fatter"!

Looking at the 'skyscrapers' one wonders "Is the so called EMPIRES, of so many GREEDY PEOPLE really a thing to be reveled at?"Probably Yes, because development is inevitable,incessant and necessary. Moreover hasn't a Renowned Philospher,Herbert Spencer quoted "Survival of the fittest" i.e. he only survives who is fit and is able to win the race of life,say like snakes which eats most of its own eggs after laying....Now we have to think... Do we want ourselves to be identified with such cold blooded animals or a warm blooded human being? Which once again, another acclaimed Thinker, Aristotle has quoted as a "Rational Animal". I do not want to challenge their statements but isn't it ironical how can a Rational Animal survive and be the fittest because one who is "rational" at times will definitely be "Emotional" as he would possess "a brain" and not "a mechanized instrument" in his skull. I guarantee a man with a "throbbing brain" has to be emotional at times and an 'Emotional Man" can never survive amongst the Snakes. His emotions will unknowingly and accidentally will turn out to be such follies which will take shapes of rock-sized obstructions in the path of "said progress"!

The other day while watching television,sitting comfortably in my quilt,sipping coffee and waiting for the arrival of New Year 2010,I could not help thinking about those who might not even know "what a new year is"? For them EVERY DAY AND EVERY NIGHT is a race to be alive....the "survival of the fittest" whether it be for them slyly creeping and intruding properties, in which they have no access or again hugging a 'pig' or a 'dog' to keep them warm and alive..HAVEN'T THEY TOO DEVISED MEANS TO SURVIVE ON "THIS BEAUTIFUL PLANET" with "BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE MASTERING AMAZING TONGUE TWISTERS"!This indeed is a mock at all those who claim to be "humane" and close to "humanity" and that includes probably ME TOO! Sitting comfortably and thinking about the underprivileged is an easy way to show compassion but to venture out to lend a helping hand, in the biting cold with equally cold screeching wind is TRUE COMPASSION.

I do not want to be a "PHILOSOPHICAL GURU" and chide the human race I only want a few drops of nectar in form of compassion and affection for those who do not know the real meaning of being a HUMAN BEING...those sometimes hugging animals are closer to compassion and humanity than "those who sit in palatial buildings and formulate plans for such people".The other day while taking my routine walk early in the morning about 6:30a.m. I saw three children(their real photos, with their mother's permission is there at the start of the write-up), all girls aged about seven,five and one.I could not stop myself from asking their names because in this chilling cold,the elder one named "JYOTI" was carrying the youngest named "ANCHAL" Again this was a dire case of IRONY because Anchal means warm soothing covering of a woman's dress and here this 'anchal' to the youngest was provided by a seven year old tender aged child who herself needed love,care and affection!!They were all sisters and the middle one,named "KAJAL" informed me that since their mother had to go early in the morning to "Kothis" for odd works like cleaning,washing utensils etc hence they had to look after their baby sister..I felt ashamed of myself and I knew why.... because without engaging a domestic help even our lives do not run smoothly and we hardly are bothered to look at the stream of pain flowing beyond our luxury and comforts..wasn't this again a slap on the face of our system and government which puts hoardings 'banning child labor' and under the same hoardings such children either directly or indirectly like JYOTI are taking shelter from different shades of life!

I am not here to force my "thoughts" or "views" on anybody.I wrote what I felt like- what my soul wanted to write.....'Selfishness' is a human trait, present in everyone of us. But isn't 'compassion' too an inherent quality gifted to us naturally which we have unashamedly hidden under a quilt of MATERIALISM! What really needed, is "A few drops of compassionate nectar" and the entire race of all behaviors would come to peace!
Rashmi.

Decision Making-Key Of Enriched Personality

VARIOUS ASPECTS OF DECISION MAKING

A lot has been said and written on PERSONALITY TRAITS and the FACTORS constituting
it.But as far as I perceive,the CHIEF KEY INGREDIENT of it is a PERSON'S ABILITY TO TAKE CORRECT DECISION AT A PARTICULAR TIME which can take him a step further on his desired path-because that particular time is never going to come back and benefit him in any way.

Decision Making is not a child's play and many significant writers and renowned people have presented their dissertations on the said topic involving lots of tongue-twisters and words which generally overflow the minds of common people.Here I have tried to highlight its importance in a simple manner which would surely help the readers.

The functional area of Decision Making is wide and has seen its vital place in World Wars, appeasement treaties, Economic Recessions and crises to release of movies,deciding schools for children,buying or not buying a car or house at a certain time and many more other areas which may at times seem insignificant but has immense impact on our lives.Here I am reminded of the novel "Name Of Rose" by Umberto Eco
published in 1980.Initially the publishers had expected its sale up to 3000 copies but in total 10 million copies of it was sold after publication.In U.S.itself about 2 million copies were sold!The success of the novel is till now,a mystery to the publishers as well as to the author himself.Eco says probably it was the right time,when the novel was published-had it been published ten years before or ten years
after,it would have BOMBED!So knowingly or unknowingly Eco's and the publishers decision to publish the novel at that particular time span was responsible for its overwhelming success!So, here, the correct timing was in a way responsible for the success of the said novel.

As we all know there are many key factors which moulds our decisions-these are situations,circumstances,incidents,grooming,wealth,right values and many more.Decision-making is a tough job even if it is made at such levels as to what dress should be worn by one at a certain place or function.It involves a meticulous analysis of all possible opportunities i.e. dresses and accessories available at that time.

My readers must be surprised to see me suddenly jump from the ongoing topic EMOTIONAL ABUSE. To them I would like to convey that I am not switching from the topic or deviating.In fact I am coming to it-what I am trying to bring out is the point that in situations of such abuses too,one has to take stern and immediate decisions,instead of dilly-dallying and finally coming to an undesirable end.If the person,here,chooses to stay with the abuser he/she should inculcate in himself enough mental courage to brave all kinds of situations and can make a recognizable place for himself in the society.This however is extremely difficult as constant berating hampers the confidence and the person feels "good for nothing." Hence to go ahead in life positively,one has to take the decision of his life within time.In doing so he might become an object of 'jest' but this is much better than leading a mentally paralytic life!In fact such decisions enhances the confidence of the person striving to come out of undesirable circumstances,and
ENRICHES his personality.

Correct decision at the correct time without being confused,bewildered,,matters a lot.Such clear decisions can only make one to move ahead in life despite of all kinds of obstacles and hurdles. Sometimes some decision can be risky too and requires lot of courage and positivity.In such cases right attitude,acumen and insight is needed and sometimes a DISCUSSION on the matter too helps. So before taking the BIG LEAP one should always organise his valid points WITHIN TIME and then proceed.As Robert Frost has beautifully said,"Two roads diverged in a wood,and I....I took the one less traveled by, and that made all the difference...."

Rashmi.
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CASE STUDIES

Case Study-1

These days Mental torture inflicted by Parents and Teachers in the name of 'practice','motivation 'guidance' is becoming a serious matter of concern which should be dealt even more seriously before the child starts thinking himself as a malignant cell,either ending up his life or resorting to forbidden paths.

We are here, going to see case of a boy 'X',his slipping down the ladder of life and making a timely grip on the last step,which saved him from falling into the murky, dark ocean having no exit.

X was continuously being termed as a 'failure', by one of his parent.It was this said 'parent',only, who in the beginning, had misguided the child in the guise of being a lovable guardian and provided him with all sorts of unwanted luxury,just to prove a better parent as compared to his spouse.Here we see that domestic strife laid its ugly hands on the child's future.By the time X realised his mistake,he was already being called as a 'jerk' by the same 'lovable guardian' of his-the only relief he had at that time, was the other parent stood by him ,to reorganise his life before it was too late.Today, X is not only studying in tier 1 Engineering College,but has also understood the value of money.

In the above case ,X got a mentor as well at the same time and insight to do well.But how many of such children are so accurately lucky?Future of most of such children become bleak either due to abusive domestic environment or constant 'unhealthy belittling',bringing their morale to a level, surrounded with gloominess.

Motivating a child is no easy game,hence care should be taken that he/she in no ways is being compared to others and berated(which is constantly done by the parents and teachers).A child has to compete with his own calibre.We cannot expect to have a child's talent"cloned"!!.Every child is gifted with some quality or other-the beauty lies in bringing out their such qualities and providing them with suitable platform comfortable and suitable to their personalities as each child is gifted with different personality traits.

A ROSE has its own beauty and a LILY its own!RIVERS can never be OCEANS and OCEANS can never be RIVERS.Every thing and every human being has its own importance and beauty.The need of the hour is to understand,hone,and polish their skill.

Rashmi.

A SONG WITH A DIFFERENCE

This video is dedicated to all such friends and wonderful people who in dire crisis have emerged and still emerge as mental and emotional saviours.This is one of my favorite songs which provides with a soothing effect that can't be expressed in words!!